So for everyone that knows me, they also know I am obssessed with the show Jon and Kate Plus Eight and A Baby Story. I am absolutely in love with babies...and pregnancy... and having babies... and how cute they are...and how small they are. AH! Its like so weird because for me, I have always been the type of girl who has WANTED to be a mom. I have always loved the idea of having a big family..yes, I have always wanted a job, always wanted to be able to take care of myself, but most of all, wanted to get married and have babies. I go to college not because I want to get some serious job and become a work a holic who makes lots of money, but because I know realistically I need a job. I need money to be able to support myself. I need money to be able to help support me, Dan and our *One day* family. I always knew what I wanted to name my kids, how many I wanted to have... etc. So yeah recently, between having biology class and watching A baby story it has actually kind of scared me into not knowing if I want kids or if I would want more than like, 1. There is SO much that can go wrong it totally freaks me out. I have seriously not seen more than like maybe 2 or 3 episodes of A baby story where the labor goes perfectly. AH! Like I think giving birth is one of the most beautiful things a woman can do and I really feel lucky that I am a woman and will be able to maybe one day experience that but whoa...everything that is going on with the body at that time is just nuts. Then there is everything that can go wrong with the baby, like do you know how many disorders,
etc there are out there?!?! A TRILLION!!! It scares me...to death. Like enough that me, Mother Goose herself would actually think she doesnt know what she feels about having kids. That is crazy. Then on the other hand I think of how amazing having a baby is . Like you are coming together with a person you love and youre mixing into one. That little baby is going to be the perfect combo of you and your love. What could be any better than that? So when people say Im crazy for wanting lots of kids, Im like, I dont think its that Im crazy, I think its that Im so in love with Dan, so in love with our life and so in love with where our future is heading that I really cant help but want he and I to have that special link together forever. A link that we will always share, that we will grow with, that we will come together for and that will bond us as a family forever. I have grown a lot as a person since Dan has come into my life. For anyone that knew me before I was with him and anyone that knew me after they would easily say it is a night and day difference. I also look at my life more maturely now too. I want good things for myself. I want to graduate College and I know I am capable of it, I want to be the best friend I can be, I want to be the best girlfriend I can be, the best sister and daughter to my family, I want to get a great job where Dan and I will have the ability to enjoy the finer things in life, I want to one day be the most amazing wife, and I want to one day be the most amazing Mother. I am really...whats the word for it?...Hopeful?!...Hopeful towards my life, where it is going and what I am going to be able to continue to bring to the lives of everyone around me as time goes on. I love my life, my love, my family and my friends. I really couldnt ask for anything more...and Sorry for making that a really serious entry lol...I just got inspired!
etc there are out there?!?! A TRILLION!!! It scares me...to death. Like enough that me, Mother Goose herself would actually think she doesnt know what she feels about having kids. That is crazy. Then on the other hand I think of how amazing having a baby is . Like you are coming together with a person you love and youre mixing into one. That little baby is going to be the perfect combo of you and your love. What could be any better than that? So when people say Im crazy for wanting lots of kids, Im like, I dont think its that Im crazy, I think its that Im so in love with Dan, so in love with our life and so in love with where our future is heading that I really cant help but want he and I to have that special link together forever. A link that we will always share, that we will grow with, that we will come together for and that will bond us as a family forever. I have grown a lot as a person since Dan has come into my life. For anyone that knew me before I was with him and anyone that knew me after they would easily say it is a night and day difference. I also look at my life more maturely now too. I want good things for myself. I want to graduate College and I know I am capable of it, I want to be the best friend I can be, I want to be the best girlfriend I can be, the best sister and daughter to my family, I want to get a great job where Dan and I will have the ability to enjoy the finer things in life, I want to one day be the most amazing wife, and I want to one day be the most amazing Mother. I am really...whats the word for it?...Hopeful?!...Hopeful towards my life, where it is going and what I am going to be able to continue to bring to the lives of everyone around me as time goes on. I love my life, my love, my family and my friends. I really couldnt ask for anything more...and Sorry for making that a really serious entry lol...I just got inspired!
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